When Positive Isn't the Point

We’re surrounded by messages telling us to look on the bright side, stay positive, find the good in everything.

But grief doesn’t always work that way.

I know this because I’ve lived it.

When I lost my parents, I learned very quickly that there aren’t always words that make things better. Sometimes something is simply painful. Disappointing. Unfair. Hard.

And sometimes, quite honestly, it just sucks.

You don’t have to immediately find the lesson in it. You don’t have to convince yourself that everything is going to be okay.

You can be grateful and still have a bad day.

You can be hopeful and still feel sad.

You can be moving forward and still miss someone terribly.

One doesn’t cancel out the other.

Losing my parents is what led me to create Leolam. I kept thinking about what happens after the flowers arrive, the calls slow down and everyone goes back to their lives.

You’re still grieving.

And sometimes, you just want to know that someone is still thinking about you.

That became the heart of leolam.

Not trying to fix grief. Not putting a pretty spin on something that hurts.

Just finding thoughtful ways to show up. A message. A gift. A reminder that says, I’m thinking of you. I’m here.

Because sometimes you don’t need someone to make it better.

You just need someone to stay connected.

That’s what Linda and I wanted leolam to be, a way to help people feel a little less alone, especially when words aren’t enough.